the hierarchy of poop

In monitoring Calvin's bowels, a necessary evil in keeping him regular, I have developed a hierarchy of poop, for which Calvin's teacher and ed tech, Mary, helped with the visuals. It is tacked up in the bathroom at school, each BM fastidiously documented on Calvin's daily summary sheet. Because when shit happens, I need the details.

loose = watery, ketchupy, but can have some chunks:

 

 soft = thick applesauce or soft hummus. perfect poop:

 

sticky = just like it sounds, more like peanut butter or like dog poop:

 

firm = clay like, wad, does not stick to his butt but forms into a ball of sorts, like pie dough:

 

smudge = self-explanatory
small = 1/4 cup or less
medium = 1/2 - 3/4 of a cup
large = a cup or more