gratitude again

already, i sense another seizure coming on. my son is restless, dropping down, agitated, putting his fingers in his mouth, staring at the sun. and so, to get my mind off the dread, i turn to gratitude. it helps me forget the worry, at least for a moment or two. i think about all that i'm thankful for ... 

long walks with smellie the dog. a body that works well and is healthy. stovetop espresso with warm milk on a cold morning. well-seasoned cast iron skillets. weekend eggs fried in olive oil to jammy perfection. sunny days with winds which almost feel warm. blue jeans and hoodies. new neighbors who give my boy their first hug. the smell of homemade cheese bread fresh from a hot oven. the sweet and powerful voice of kate bush. catching up with an old friend on the telephone. clear view to the backyard shrubs, having cut down the perennials. my husband, who cooks ridiculously delicious food. blue skies so crisp it's as if they've been starched, stretching to forever and back again. quotes by albert einstein on the meaning of life. deep conversations with a new friend. understanding that being a martyr is not attractive. converse ten-buck chuck taylor all-stars in two new colors, which somehow brighten my mood. clean windows looking out on a green garden. fresh coat of gray-green paint on the house trim. watching leaves and limbs shiver and sway in the wind. big fat blue jay in the bird bath bathing. sunlight streaming through the brunswick window, and the way it lights up a face, a wall, a room. cannabis as medicine for epilepsy. michael's margaritas sporting a kosher salt rim. smoked-chicken enchiladas. funny movies and tragedies. my adorable son.